A Fresh Start

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Spattered and happy after scrubbing all the outdoor wooden furniture

Next to the washing machine, I tugged on my yellow rubber gloves. The last set without holes. Oxygen bleach in hand, I made for the kitchen to prepare the scrub, then headed out back to meet the challenge before me — a picnic table, end table, wooden chair, and porch swing.

Three hours into scrubbing the moss and mildew that had taken up residence there, I muttered my disgust to Seda. “This is negligence,” I said. “I’m so disappointed in myself. I don’t know how I let it get this bad.”

“It’s moss. It’s a living thing,” said Seda, which helped me feel better. “And didn’t you just do this last year?” I shook my head and began to calculate. It was typically a job I did every 2-3 years — washing or sanding, then oiling the wood deck and furnishings. But this time? My mouth fell open as I did the math: 2016.

Before my knee surgery, before my body break-down-wake-up. Before Collier Connections. Seven years had lapsed since I’d fallen down the rabbit hole then reemerged into this new life. I examined the muddy scrub brush in my hand. Wow. My heart swelled with gratitude for life, for my body, for my patio furniture. What a gift to get to care for them.

I scrubbed for almost four and a half hours straight, finishing up by headlamp. In 2019, I’d laid in bed and wondered if I’d ever be able to pick up a glass of water without excruciating pain. Astounding. The mold and moss had angered me, and now they brought me only gratitude.

What uncomfortable work have you done lately that offered a welcome new perspective? What did you come to appreciate?